Alright, well this is the first time I have blogged. EVER. So I pretty much don't know what I'm doing or what to write so I will just wing it.
First you are probably wondering, what's up with the blog title??
Well it starts with the story of my very closest friend who was diagnosed with brain cancer over one year ago. His story is so fasinating and touching, but I will not say more until I have permission to talk about him on here.
Anyways, this very close friend told me I was taking my life for granted. It was SO true! I really needed the slap in the face to get me to realize it. He is the most inspiring person I have ever met, so of course I'm going to listen to him. I'm glad I did because made me realize I need to be thankful that I am healthy and able to do things and go places. I didn't before because it made me feel guilty because some people can't do that, so I told myself that it was extreamly selfish to do things while the people I love have to stay home, trying to feel better. I felt extreamly guilty and just wanted to stay and be there for my friend whenever he needed me ((though I'm very very glad I did-and still do)), but even if it meant canceling plans with people and not going to things that people ask me to go to just to "get out"for a night. I have to admit that I stay home and sleep WAY too much. But I don't know about you, but staying home for a few days in a row without going anywhere makes me go crazyyyy. I blamed this whole thing on depression, it was a good enough excuse for a while but now I want to turn my life around and give it a purpose, make it so I don't have any more depression. I want to use the fact that I am healthy and turn it into something useful. My goal is to somehow touch someone's life in a positive way, hopefully someone that is batteling cancer. I try my hardest to help out with my friend as much as I can, he lives far away so there is only so much I can do :( ((I try my very hardest to do everything I can for him.)) I want to help the brave, strong people who are fighting with everything they have. I want to give them hope, someone to talk to, someone to make them feel special when they are feeling their worst, and let them know that they aren't alone.
So basically I want to turn my life around and make it into something useful and to helpful to others, because that is truely what makes me the happiest I can be inside.
So the answer to the question is, I don't want to feel like I'm "Just that girl" anymore. I want to feel like I have made a positive difference in someone, anyones life. I may only be fifteen but I feel like I've grown up 3 years in the past few months. I don't really worry about the superficial things most of my friends worry about, and I kind of stick out like a sore thumb because of it. I don't mind because I stay true to myself, I don't judge, and I try to put myself in other's shoes. I have learned SO much in the past year it's insane.
Now I can feel a change coming around the corner. It's definately scary but what ever it is, I'm going to face it, and turn it into something positive. Just as my very close friend would do. :)
